iHype reaching fever pitch

This is still as funny today as when it originally aired on MadTV earlier this year. I figured I'd show it again for a number of reasons, the chief one being that the much vaunted iPhone is being launched tomorrow.

I'm not too excited about the iPhone for two reasons:

1. As a Verizon Wireless customer, it's unavailable to me. I find it mindlessly stupid that Apple would strike an exclusive deal with one cell provider - it makes no sense on its face. But, then again, I'm sure that there's a lot I don't know, like how many zeroes the check has that they received from AT&T/Cingular for said deal.

At first blush, it looks like a rare mistake by Apple cofounder and CEO Steve Jobs, but I'm probably wrong about that. When he first rolled out the iPod, a product I can now officially never live without (along with hyperbole), it was only available to the approximately five percent of computer users (and it wasn't that much back then) who used the Macintosh. As soon as the iPod was available to Windows users, I snatched one up quicker than you can say Cultural Icon.

I've already blogged about this at length, but I won't do business with AT&T/Cingular Wireless again. I had bad experiences with both, so no dough for them. But, since cell phone companies are merging quicker than drunken spring break coeds, I may be forced to do so in the future. We'll see.

2. Sticker shock. It's insane to spend the kind of money on a cell phone that the iPhone is costing people - upward of $700 for the 8GB model. The 8GB phone is supposed to be going for $599, but being an iPod veteran (I'm on #5), I know that there's lots of stuff not included in the box that you will almost certainly want. So, with tax and an accessory or two later, your mortgage payment is threatened.

So, until the phone is available to everyone and the price comes over to this side of reasonable, no thanks. As much of a self-admitted Tech Whore I am, I've been remarkably resilient at resisting the cell phone trap. Yes, I have my RAZR like tens of millions of others, but I waited until they were under $100 before getting one. That's my limit on a cell phone, and for two simple reason - it's just a damn phone, and I have a very bad track record of involuntarily bouncing them off of the hardest surface possible on dozens of occassions.

Anyway, I'm immune to the iPhone bug, for now. I'm sure it will get around to biting me sooner or later though, just like the iPod did. I took a quick sneak peak at the features on Apple's Website, and I'll admit the phone does look like something special. But, iStopped after a few minutes. Why do this to myself? Apple's products should almost be regulated by the DEA - something in them just makes people want more and more of them. Bill Gates must be having Genius-envy right about now.

And people thought Microsoft won the MS/Apple War. Not so fast, Billy. Apple still has light years to go to catch up with Microsoft in terms of overall tech dominance, but Apple boasts Microsoft Windows-like monopoly on chic.

The big story now is that millions of people are lining up for the iPhone already, though. Jobs never misses an opportunity to iHype any and all Apple product releases, and iPhone is his best, ahem, Job yet in marketing mastery. I heard on the Today show yesterday that people are actually flying over from China and elsewhere to get their hands on one. Phew - money and time - people obviously have a lot of it on their hands.

I've spent a great deal of money on photography equipment in my life, but as much as I've anticipated new products and gadgets, I wouldn't consider for a second getting on a plane to Japan to go get the latest camera or lens, even if I did have the money and time. I also justify my photography habit by reasoning that an expensive lens can last a photographer years, if not decades, if well cared for (and I BABY my equipment).

A cell phone? The shelf life on those is shorter than a hockey season; you no sooner buy one and a company is rolling out something bigger, better, fadder. (iLove inventing words.)

People who buy early are simply paying a premium for something they can get for much less a year or maybe even six months from now. Translation: someone has to pay for all of this advertising, eh, Mr. Jobs?

iPhone? iCanWait.