iHype reaching fever pitch

This is still as funny today as when it originally aired on MadTV earlier this year. I figured I'd show it again for a number of reasons, the chief one being that the much vaunted iPhone is being launched tomorrow.

I'm not too excited about the iPhone for two reasons:

1. As a Verizon Wireless customer, it's unavailable to me. I find it mindlessly stupid that Apple would strike an exclusive deal with one cell provider - it makes no sense on its face. But, then again, I'm sure that there's a lot I don't know, like how many zeroes the check has that they received from AT&T/Cingular for said deal.

At first blush, it looks like a rare mistake by Apple cofounder and CEO Steve Jobs, but I'm probably wrong about that. When he first rolled out the iPod, a product I can now officially never live without (along with hyperbole), it was only available to the approximately five percent of computer users (and it wasn't that much back then) who used the Macintosh. As soon as the iPod was available to Windows users, I snatched one up quicker than you can say Cultural Icon.

I've already blogged about this at length, but I won't do business with AT&T/Cingular Wireless again. I had bad experiences with both, so no dough for them. But, since cell phone companies are merging quicker than drunken spring break coeds, I may be forced to do so in the future. We'll see.

2. Sticker shock. It's insane to spend the kind of money on a cell phone that the iPhone is costing people - upward of $700 for the 8GB model. The 8GB phone is supposed to be going for $599, but being an iPod veteran (I'm on #5), I know that there's lots of stuff not included in the box that you will almost certainly want. So, with tax and an accessory or two later, your mortgage payment is threatened.

So, until the phone is available to everyone and the price comes over to this side of reasonable, no thanks. As much of a self-admitted Tech Whore I am, I've been remarkably resilient at resisting the cell phone trap. Yes, I have my RAZR like tens of millions of others, but I waited until they were under $100 before getting one. That's my limit on a cell phone, and for two simple reason - it's just a damn phone, and I have a very bad track record of involuntarily bouncing them off of the hardest surface possible on dozens of occassions.

Anyway, I'm immune to the iPhone bug, for now. I'm sure it will get around to biting me sooner or later though, just like the iPod did. I took a quick sneak peak at the features on Apple's Website, and I'll admit the phone does look like something special. But, iStopped after a few minutes. Why do this to myself? Apple's products should almost be regulated by the DEA - something in them just makes people want more and more of them. Bill Gates must be having Genius-envy right about now.

And people thought Microsoft won the MS/Apple War. Not so fast, Billy. Apple still has light years to go to catch up with Microsoft in terms of overall tech dominance, but Apple boasts Microsoft Windows-like monopoly on chic.

The big story now is that millions of people are lining up for the iPhone already, though. Jobs never misses an opportunity to iHype any and all Apple product releases, and iPhone is his best, ahem, Job yet in marketing mastery. I heard on the Today show yesterday that people are actually flying over from China and elsewhere to get their hands on one. Phew - money and time - people obviously have a lot of it on their hands.

I've spent a great deal of money on photography equipment in my life, but as much as I've anticipated new products and gadgets, I wouldn't consider for a second getting on a plane to Japan to go get the latest camera or lens, even if I did have the money and time. I also justify my photography habit by reasoning that an expensive lens can last a photographer years, if not decades, if well cared for (and I BABY my equipment).

A cell phone? The shelf life on those is shorter than a hockey season; you no sooner buy one and a company is rolling out something bigger, better, fadder. (iLove inventing words.)

People who buy early are simply paying a premium for something they can get for much less a year or maybe even six months from now. Translation: someone has to pay for all of this advertising, eh, Mr. Jobs?

iPhone? iCanWait.

Apple announces... iBodyArmor?

Sometimes, you just hope a story is true and not some stupid hoax making its way around the Internets. This is one of them.

I found this on Keith Olbermann's blog, TheNewsHole, and it brought a smile to my face.

Pictured above, according to Olbermann's blog and a link to Flickr where the photos originated, is a picture of Christine and Kevin Garrad. And they have reason to smile.

Evidently, Garrad (3rd Infantry Division) was patrolling a street patrol in Iraq and as he rounded the corner of a building he came face to face with an insurgent. As the two were just a few feet apart, they both opened fire. The insurgent was killed, and Garrad was hit in the left chest where his trusty iPod was in his jacket pocket. His iPod slowed down the bullet enough that that it didn't pierce his body armor. He reportedly escaped the incident unscathed and unwounded.

This sort of brings life into perspective, doesn't it.

I don't think this one will be playing songs any time soon.

I'd love it if Apple sent Garrad another iPod - jacked up with all of the bells and whistles. The Apple people should send him the top-of-the-line model, complete with lots of songs and an engraving on the back, thanking him for his service in Iraq.

Here's hoping you get home safely from iRaq in one piece, and that you get a new iPod soon, Kevin.

I'm going to write Apple Computer to find out if they have heard of this story, and also asking them to send Garrad a new one.

NYC banning pedestrian iPod use?

Just when I think government couldn't possibly invade and dictate our lives any more, out rolls another example of a do-gooder politician with his idea of a utopian society.

More like a dystopian one.

New York State Senator Carl Kruger (D-Brooklyn) (pictured at left) has introduced legislation to stamp out "iPod oblivion," a bill designed to eliminate what the senator calls the self-induced stupor, which has led to a number of fatal accidents in New York City. The bill would ban the use of iPods, PDAs — even cellphones — while in a crosswalk.

"You can't be fully aware of your surroundings if you're fiddling with a BlackBerry, dialing a phone number, playing Super Mario Brothers on a Game Boy, or listening to music on an iPod," Krueger said in a statement, as quoted in The New York Times.

While Druger didn't have statistics, he's serious about his proposal. According to the Times:

While he did not cite any statistical studies that have indicated a rise in such incidents, he referred to the January death of a 23-year-old Brooklyn man who, tuned into his iPod headphones, walked into the path of a city bus.

The bill would effectively make it illegal to use any kind of portable electronic device–a music or video player, cell phone, smart phone, gaming device, etc. while crossing the street in cities such as New York, Albany and Buffalo. Offenders would be slapped with a $100 fine and a criminal court summons. Joggers and bicyclists would have to limit their iPod use to city parks in which no street crossing would be involved.

What's next, banning gum chewing while walking the streets?

I can see Kruger's point - I really can - but limiting someone's personal freedoms because of a few unfortunate accidents is not what America is all about.

I'm sick and tired of government telling us how to live our lives. If someone doesn't have the common sense to watch where he or she is walking in the busiest city in New York, will a law help them? I don't know. And what's more, where do you draw the line? What about Bluetooth headsets?

Maybe Starbucks is behind this - anyone who wants to listen to an iPod or make or take a phone call will have to duck into coffee shops and restaurants.

It just seems so silly to me. And wouldn't this fall into one of those unenforceable laws? With murder, rape and drugs as prevalent as they are in the city, it strikes me as absurd that there would be cops walking the city streets and harassing people for listening to iPods and making phone calls.

Here's hoping common sense will prevail in the Empire State.

Apple & Jobs have done it again

Apple and Steve Jobs have done it again.

What a wild ride it's been for Apple since Jobs returned as CEO in 1997. First, the iMac, then the iPod, and now the iPhone.

I was in college when the iMac was introduced, and I used them extensively. It was a groundbreaking computer which probably saved the company. I actually only used a Macintosh for the first 10 years that I used a computer.

Through good and bad, I've always been a fan of Apple. And there was some bad, to be sure -- we used to call Adobe PageMaker RageMaker when we'd do layout for the newspaper at Kutztown University. Apple made my four semesters as editor in chief both a joy and a curse, but in the end of I love Apple, and the Macintosh.

But, after graduation, I tilted toward the "PC" world - I used a PC at work, and it really didn't make much sense to buy an Apple. So, I bought a PC with an AMD processor, and we recently purchased a new Dell Computer.

However, when the iPod was introduced in 2001, I instantly fell in love with it, but couldn't own it, because I didn't own a Mac. But, since Mac had about three percent of the U.S. computer market at the time, I knew it would only be a matter of time before the iPod went PC, and mainstream.

It did in '02, and I bought one as a layoff present to myself. (Yea, you read that right.) Five iPods later, my love for the iPod is as strong as ever; besides my digital cameras, if I were on a deserted island, it would be the tech gadget I'd have to have.

So, naturally I took notice when the iPhone was introduced last week, for about two seconds, until I found out that Cingular is the exclusive cell phone service provider, and will be until 2009. (Above, Jobs shakes hands with Cingular CEO Stan Sigman) I will never, EVER be a customer of Cingular Wireless ever again. They are on my permanent boycott list.

Just like Apple limited itself when the first iPod was rolled out in a "Mac only" version, the company is making the same mistake with the iPhone. Oh well.

Not that I'd be rushing to get one anyway. Vandra may not believe me, but I wouldn't have been in a hurry to get one anyway - I'm a self-confessed tech whore, but not with cell phones. I flat out drop them too much.

Knock on wood, I've never have a cell phone last me very long, because I drop them much too often. My current Razr holds the record - almost two years! I still can't believe it.

Anyway, I have some doubts that this one will succeed for Apple (which renamed itself at MacWorld "Apple Inc." and dropped the "Apple Computer" name). The cell phone segment is a whole new ballgame. Are people going to pay $500 for a phone?

No way in hell would I pay that kind of scratch for a phone. Especially when I have an iPod I love, and a digital camera that's much nicer than the one on this overpriced phone.

Here's a scenario where I'd buy one - they are down to $99, Verizon carries them, and I happen to need a cell phone. Not 'til then.

The iPhone could be another winner for Apple, but I don't think Jobs thought this one through. Even the name might be problematic - Cisco Systems has already announced that it's suing Apple over the name "iPhone." But then again, people have underestimated Jobs for over 30 years, so I wouldn't be surprised if the iPhone is the next big thing for the company, and Jobs.

Apple is great, but Cingular ain't. C'mon, Steve - don't limit this product, or your company. Until the price comes down and another cell carrier offers iPhones, color me iDon'tcare.

Blowhard Bill contradicts himself, again

Check out this little nugget of wisdom from Bill O'Lielly the other day on his radio show (courtesy of GamePolitics.com):

I don’t own an iPod. I would never wear an iPod… If this is your primary focus in life - the machines… it’s going to have a staggeringly negative effect, all of this, for America… did you ever talk to these computer geeks? I mean, can you carry on a conversation with them? …I really fear for the United States because, believe me, the jihadists? They’re not playing the video games. They’re killing real people over there.

After reading this, I went to O'Lielly's Website to check out the comedy. It took me all of 30 seconds to find a premium membership that any empty-headed conservative can subscribe to, which includes a podcast!

I'm wondering just how stupid O'Lielly thinks his listeners are? Must be pretty stupid, probably about as stupid as Ann Coulter thinks her readers are. They both should join forces and use the motto We decide, you just watch and read. And don't forget to listen to our podcasts on your demonic iPod.

I poked around his online store and couldn't help clownin' on it. Not only does O'Lielly think his readers and listeners are dumb, but he must think they're rich. Check this out...

Now you, too, can be a culture warrior, for $14.95. Fifteen bucks (+ shipping) for a stupid coffee mug? Hey Billy, it's bad enough you lie, distort, sexually harrass and intimidate (or at least try to), but you're now adding robbery to your dossier? Uh oh, wait - is Fox Security going to be knocking on my door? I'm sorry, Bill - I didn't mean it!

Sheesh - anyone who can stomach listening to your blarney night in and night out ought to get a free mug, as long as your mug isn't on the mug, Culture Warrior. Thank God Congress is finally going to do something about the minimum wage (and it took Democrats taking over Congress to make it happen). Pretty soon, poor slobs who actually believe your bullshit will only have to work about 2.5 hours to get one of these red beauties, plus tax and shipping.

What a deal.

iPod turns 5; and a must-hear podcast

Tomorrow, October 23, marks the 5th birthday of one of the most influential gadgets of our time: the iPod. I've owned every generation of iPod since they were first introduced. I bought my first one about a year after they were introduced, and it's been a four-year love affair since. And, like my marriage, I can say with confidence that it's definitely going to last.

Thinking about the iPod's birthday today, I was looking at pictures of my first one (above), and it looks primitive when compared to today's version (below), currently in its fifth generation, and counting.

The iPod has transformed how I listen to my music, how I'm entertained, and how I get my news, too. Lately, with my long commute to Kutztown to work, I've taken up audio books, and they are fantastic. Gone are the days of carrying around thick, heavy books of CDs; it's all in this sleek little box. I take mine with me everywhere - exercising, in the car (I have a docking cradle which transmits what I listen to over the radio - suweet!), to work, everywhere.

Cooler yet is the Podcast - mini audio programs that you can download from iTunes and thousands of other Websites that you can listen to on the go. The latest version of iPod also plays video, so now you can download TV shows and recently Apple announced movies are being rolled out. There's no end in sight to iPod's dominance of the mp3 player medium - here's hoping that the company doesn't get complacent. So far, it hasn't rested on the success of iPods; with the recent announcement that movies will be available for download from its online music store, iPod announced players with bigger hard drives and competitive prices.

Microsoft won the OS war, but Windows was never this cool.

Of course, there are cynics abound who are predicting Apple's iPod will just be a passing fad. Perhaps, but I doubt it. To date, there have been 60 million iPods sold, and 40 million have been bought in the past year. Of course Apple won't keep up that pace of sales growth - eventually, it will probably reach cell phone status, where most people who have one will have one, as an article I read tonight reasons.

But, I doubt there will be a dramatic fall-off. Apple usually finds a way. Here's betting Apple co-founder and CEO Steven Jobs will keep us iPod-ified for years to come. I know I'm a user and fan for the foreseeable future.
Speaking of the iPod, my latest craze associated with it is the podcast. As long as I've owned an iPod, I just never really got into them, until this summer. I'm now addicted. In fact, I have so many podcasts on my player that I'm constantly behind on listening to them all; "podcast guilt," as a former professor of mine labeled it to me a few weeks ago, much to my amusement.

One particular podcast is worth mentioning here - I never miss listening every week. It's one of the most moving series I've heard in a long time. It's called My Cancer, by NPR journalist journalist Leroy Sievers (left).

It's moving, amazing, gut wrenching and heartbreaking. And that was all in the first month I listened to it. It comes out every Thursday or Friday, and every Friday, when I sync my iPod to my computer and update my podcasts, I always wonder, and yes, I'm afraid that Leroy will be gone, and I won't get to hear his podcasts any longer. That's selfish, I know, but the reason I don't want him to die is because he's so inspirational and he sets a good example while facing his own death.

If you are an iPod aficionado, I urge you to listen to Sievers' My Cancer - it will help you appreciate how courageous people who suffer from cancer are, and most of all, it will help you appreciate your own life and how lucky we all are to have our health and to have people who love us.

Thanks for showing us the way, Leroy, and I hope you get well and beat this thing.

My latest love: Podcasting

I am not a stranger to owning an iPod. In fact, I'm on my 5th one - I've owned every generation, I think. My latest model is the 60 GB iPod Video. I couldn't be happier with it. I owned the very first iPod, which, looking back at it now from about 4 years ago, looks ancient compared to the new ones.



Anyway, I'm a little late to the game, but the latest thing I love about my iPod is Podcasting. What is that, you might ask? (And I would ask, how's that cave you've been livin' in?) Anyway, it's downloading audio and video shows from iTunes (the world-renowned software that accompanies an iPod), almost all of them for free. It's fantastic! It now competes with my much loved Sirius Satellite Radio for my attention in the car. Even more exciting is that starting this fall, my long commute to KU will feel a lot shorter with so much material to listen to.

Early favorite Podcasts include a compliment of Slate programs, five different NPRs, VH-1's Best Week Ever, four different features from the New York Times, several from ESPN, and I even subscribe to several Podcasts from my beloved Edmonton Oilers, which include all press conferences. Righteous!

In short, Podcasting is my new addiction. And, of course, I love the video Podcasts. The picture is clear as a bell on my iPod video, too. It's like having mini TV shows at your fingertips, without the commercials. I'm loading up the iPod for our two weeks in Mexico. I may be about halfway to filling up my 60 GB in another week with all of my music, coupled with lots of videos and Podcasts.

Microsoft may have Windows, and with it an enduring legacy, but Apple will always have the iPod. Microsoft wins that matchup on many fronts, but not in hipness and coolness. Steven Jobs not only saved Apple, but he couldn't have done it without the many brilliant minds in Apple's R&D labs who gave the world the iPod; the company shipped just over 8 million iPods in the last quarter alone. Wow. Try as he might, Bill Gates has yet to even scratch the surface in the war for mini-music players, which are quickly becoming mini-media players. Apple dominates the MP-3 player segment with over 70 percent market share. Sounds like Windows-type domination to me.

If you are looking for an MP-3 player, look no further than the bitten fruit. Other companies have players that may cost a bit less and have a few more accessories, like FM radio, but who the hell cares about FM radio? That's deader than a Michael Jackson daycare. In the end, iPod outperforms them all anyway - the proof is in the market share.

In the portable media player universe, iGod.